Monday, December 7, 2009
Albuquerque or Bust...
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Happy Halloween
Also Jordan got me a new camera for my birthday (a little early) so now I might actually post some pictures, but we will have to see if I get any better at this blogging thing ;).
Saturday, August 8, 2009
The things I learned this past year...
1- Halloween is the best holiday ever. (Sorry my camera had struggles this day)
My sister and I have had our costumes for this year picked out since May. :)
2- My family are the funniest people I will ever know. We make "funnies" left and right.
3- K-mart can be the most entertaining place you have ever been if you are with the right people!!
4- The Merry-Go-Round at K-mart is the best 25 Cents you will EVER Spend. That thing goes for like ten minutes.
5-I LOVE the rain!! unless it is at Lagoon.
6- Life is only as simple as YOU make it.
7- Sitting THROUGH traffic is better than sitting IN Traffic. :)
hours watching 200 cars fight for one gate at Stadium of Fire.
9- Sometimes in life your best just simply isn't enough, but with the Lord your best is always enough.
10- That Cartoon Characters can answer some of lifes most serious problems!!
11- I Really did marry my best friend...
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
The Awful Truth
Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.
Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.
Tax his work,
Tax his pay,
He works for peanuts
Anyway!
Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.
Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.
Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he
Tries to think.
Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers,
If he cries
Tax his tears.
Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways
To tax his ass.
Tax all he has
Then let him know
That you won't be done
Till he has no dough.
When he screams and hollers,
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till
He's good and sore.
Then tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in
Which he's laid.
Put these words
Upon his tomb,
"Taxes drove me to my doom..."
When he's gone,
Do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax.
Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Excise Taxes
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License20Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel Permit Tax
Gasoline Tax (44.75 cents per gallon)
Gross Receipts Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Inventory Tax
IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Personal Property Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service Charge Tax
Social Security Tax
Road Usage Tax
Sales Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA) Telephone Federal Excise Tax
Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes
Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
Telephone Recurring & Non-recurring Charges Tax
Telephone State and Local Tax
Telephone Usage Charge Tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft Registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax
STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?
Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.
We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest
middleclass in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.
What in the world happened? Can you spell "politicians?"
And I still have to "press 1" for Eng lish!?
And the second one - I liked is a quote by Adrian Rogers:
"You cannont legislate the poor into freedom by legislating the wealthy out of freedom. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friend, is about the end of any nation.
"You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it."
I don't know about anyone else but I am sick and tired of working my butt off and watching my husband work his butt off just to pay for my worthless neighbors cigarettes that they so nicely smoke beneath my windows so that I have to shut them in order to keep my house from smelling like a bar.
So this is to any worthless people who may be reading this (you know who you are and just in case you don't let me help you --- if you stand in line to get a check from the government so you can turn you power back on because you have been smoking cigarettes and drinking beer in the dark for a week -- it's you!!) GET A JOB - SO I DON'T HAVE TO PAY YOU TO ANNOY ME!!
Everyone else have a fabulous day!!!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Need Your Help
I really appreciate any donation that you are willing to make (if you can). This really is a great cause. Some interesting facts:
55,000 babies are born every year in Utah
20 % of those 55,000 are born to mothers wh received inadequate prenatal care
5,512 are born preterm
300 babies die before their 1st birthday
The money donated goes to help educate high risk pregnant women and families, goes towards research to find prevention of premature birth, supports education for health professionals working toward the prevention of premature birth, and goes toward programs to help pregnant women to quit smoking.
We are all at one time or another touched by the March of Dimes!! We need to do what we can to prevent tragedies and hard times.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
LOL : )
FORGET REDNECKS; THIS IS WHAT JEFF FOXWORTHY HAD TO SAY ABOUT UTAHNS!
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September to May, you live in Utah .
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Utah .
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Utah
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number, you live in Utah .
If 'vacation' means going anywhere south of Salt Lake City for the weekend, you live in Utah .
If you measure distance in hours, you live in Utah .
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Utah .
If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' and back again in the same day, you live in Utah .
If you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both unlocked, you live in Utah .
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Utah .
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Utah .
If the speed limit on the highway is 75 mph -- you're going 80, and everyone is still passing you, you live in Utah .
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you live in Utah .
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you live in Utah .
If you find 10 degrees 'a little chilly' you live in Utah .
If you actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your friends, you live in Utah .
well I hope this made someone besides me smile!!! Have a great Wednesday!!
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Quick Update
Okay so Yes we are still AliVe!! My aunt nancy informed me 2 weeks ago that I am bad at this - And she wasn't lying!! Alot has been going on since I last posted. Jordan is still at school and since he changed his major to Agriculture he has been doing AweSoMe!! He totally loves it which is a good thing because he goes to school almost all day ever day. I am still working as an Office Manager and while I enjoy it some days more than others I overall LoVe it!! I couldn't ask for a better job and better people to work with!!
Anyway since I last posted - we had an awesome Christmas and were very spoiled!!! After Christmas Kenlee got to come home with us for a fun visit. She came all by herself and spent five whole days with us. I can't believe how grown up she is - I remember babysitting here when she was like two {and really mean} lol she is so sweet now but still very fiesty!! She can always make me smile :) I had to work while she was her but her and jordan had a great time. They went tubing here in Cedar and they sure had some good stories to tell. Needless to say they entertained each other during the long days of Christmas break from school. I was great to have her.
Then Kadee came down for a shopping trip the weekend of her b-day in January!! We had such a good time. We went to the movie Mall Cop and all three of us absolutely thought it was great. ha ha Peanut-Blart and Jelly!! Then on Saturday we went hiking at snow canyon by st. George it was awesome - we totally got lost in the wilderness!! It was great and then Kadee made a new friend she named Lenny the Lizard without a tail!!! It was fabulous totally a great Kadee, Kylee, Jordan moment!! :) Then we got to go shopping in St. George and Dee got a Ton of cute clothes for her b-day - I even got some too!!!
At the end of January my cousin and his wife got to go through the Manti temple it was such a great experience {even though Jordan couldn't be there). In February we got to go to the Draper Temple Open House with some of Jordan's family {It was gorgeous} And we all found out that I AM my niece Jacqui's favorite aunt. She was sooooooooo adorable when her mom would show her the different rooms and tell her that one day she would get married there.
At the end of February my Kadee got to come back down for State Basketball that was held at the Centrum. She brought one of her friends and stayed Thursday Night with her and then on Friday our cousin Brinley joined us and stayed with us as well. We had such a good time - Who new a bunch of 14 year olds could be so Entertaining - We have to do it again girls it was too much fun!!!
In March I got the awesome opportunity to throw my cousin a baby shower. I have been working on it for a while and am so glad that it turned out good for her. It gave me something to do while Jordan has been so busy with school - I had so much fun planning it thanks for letting me throw it for you Ash - I hope you enjoyed!! Now I am booked every weekend for the next four weeks with fun stuff to do including baby showers, bridal showers, temple trips, missionary homecoming, and dancing competitions - So I will have to update again soon!!
Hope everyone is doing Well!!